Do you know that there are deviants among road users? I am not talking about drivers alone. I am talking about all road users, including pedestrians, motorcyclists and others. These deviants wal, or rather drive, on our roads with all the madness, with a quiet determination to violate every provision of the National Traffic, or rather drive, on our roads with all the madness, with a quiet determination to violate every provision of the National traffic Regulations as well as every acceptable norm of safe driving culture within our clime.
They stop at signalised traffic lights even when there is obviously no traffic and when it is obvious the traffic lights are malfunctioning. They buckle up without being threatened by the busybody road safety marshals who would never mind their bloody business but delight to counsel you even when you are too troubled to care for their daily safety lessons.
These deviants refuse to join the bandwagon by refusing to answer phone calls while behind the wheels to show off their latest priced phone, like some of those I focused on when I wrote on the green man who has done the unthinkable-stopped at the prompt of the green man to allow pedestrians, including school children, to cross at the zebra when there is actually no ‘zebra’ at sight.
These deviants are my focus this week. I have chosen to give them their flowers for choosing to be counted. If you live in Abuja, the Federal Capital Territory, Lagos, Port Harcourt or any of our major cities, you must have sighted these road users in cities where driving has become a theatre of war where only madness survives or, better still, thrives.
I am talking about cities where driving takes on the semblance of the UEFA Champions League final between Arsenal, my darling Champion of the English Premier League, and Paris Saint-Germain. During that match, football rules, according to the likes of Arsenal Legend Thiery Henry as well as Manchester United legend, Wayne Rooney, football rules like traffic regulations, were treated like polite suggestions, not meant to be obeyed.
In this maddening driving environment, the safety-conscious drivers stand out like the odd man. He is seen as an anomaly or even a traffic rebel and dissident against the prevailing doctrine of, if you can’t beat them, please join them, in the rush to be killed or maimed.
Before I go on, let me confess to you the embarrassment I sometimes feel for not joining the maddening crowd, especially when their automobile signature suggests they are big, wealthy, and prominent boys, as well as movers and shakers of the beloved country called Nigeria.
Just yesterday, I was again driving through a signalised junction when, despite the traffic light signalling a stop, vehicles of all sorts displayed the madness that has become the traffic singsong during rush hours and non-rush hours.
I must place on record that it takes courage to be a deviant and law-abiding in an environment where those who should lead by example display the unthinkable, where sirens blazing convey carelessness about reputation or about the public perception of people in authority.
If you get my drift, imagine approaching a traffic light that has turned red and signalled a stop. Common sense, traffic rules and regulations, basic self-preservation, and the thought of your loved ones would suggest that you should stop.
Yet the safety-conscious driver knows that stopping may expose him to ridicule from the impatient, death-seeking convoy of road users behind him. Horns blazing and hands waving with curses invoked. Nevertheless, the deviant remains steadfast, choosing legality over popular craze. It takes remarkable stubbornness to remain unshakable.
The deviant who prioritises compliance over being politically correct mannerisms has perfected the art of delayed gratification. While a handful view speed limits as offensive insults to their driving expertise, they see them as lifesaving guidelines. He knows that arriving late is better than being late, that arriving five minutes late is better than ending up being masked in an ambulance.
Motoring critics accuse him of drowsy driving that betrays the capacity of today’s automobile built for high and crazy speed. Why kill the engine by failing to hit the pedal at above 100 kilometres per hour instead of driving at sixty kilometres per hour, they ask. Why? Why, and why? They ask again.
The deviant resists these counsels from the pit of hell, according to my religious colleagues. A counsel that has claimed over a million lives yearly and millions injured. He understands that the road is a shared space, not a personal race track. Of all these, the habit of using indicators to inform other road users of their intention to change lanes is the most important.
Such behaviours have become so rare that blinking is seen as a sign of a mechanical fault rather than a polite traffic mannerism that communicates an intention to avoid a potential road mishap. In most cases, drivers who tail-gaze wonder why they waste their time instead of just turning off the road. They forget that he is merely communicating to promote safe driving behaviour.
Should we talk about seatbelts or child restraints, which are lifesavers for children under 12? Do you know that, despite our success story with seat belt usage, it remains a driver and front seat passenger priority, as rear-seat occupants despite our success story with seat belt usage, it remains the driver and front seat passenger priority, as occupants in the rear will boldly argue that it is only required for the front seat passenger.
This safety-conscious driver wears it even when no enforcement officer is within reach, which, to me, is the purest form of civic virtue. This is because it is easy to comply when someone is watching, which is the story in our climate. It takes real character and discipline to buckle up when no one watches.
Indeed, if integrity means doing the right thing when nobody is watching, then buckling up on an empty road or a less busy road may qualify as one of the highest forms of moral credit still available in our clime, where such seems to be a scarce commodity. This driver’s category performs another baffling act. Vehicle maintenance is a priority.
While some regard dashboard warning lights as decorative features, he insists on fixing faults before they become disasters. He religiously changes worn tyres. Repairs defective brakes. Checks mirrors, lights and steering systems. In our climate, we describe it as overdoing or excessive caution in the face of economic hardships, when they insist that faith can cover the defaults.
Despite these bashings, the deviant persists.
How about his treatment of pedestrians? You can Christian him, Mr Greenman. Unlike others who regard pedestrians as obstacles in a video game, the deviant watches out for them and acknowledges that they possess rights and have families.
So he slows down at zebras, at schools, even when the appropriate traffic signs are invisible or absent. He reduces his speed near schools, markets, and other built-up areas. He looks out for children chasing a football, and an elderly person crossing a road represents a life rather than an inconvenience. To others, this is just too much excessive humanity.
If this humanity offends you, what would you say about his disdain for alcoholic beverages when he hops behind the wheel? He understands that alcohol impairs judgement, reaction time and coordination. Driving to him is too serious a business risk, given the distracting antics.
I know that these categories of drivers are mocked daily, yet they are the reason why we celebrate life; they are usually the ones who keep driving seamlessly, reduce traffic congestion caused by crashes, caused by you, I mean you, lower insurance costs, and spare families and society the horror of avoidable deaths and injuries. Their boring driving saves lives.
Do you know the irony, crashes attract attention. A near miss becomes a joke to some, while reckless overtaking is hailed as heroic. Yet the several safety journeys completed without issue are rarely captured, even when a driver is at the wheel. The several safety journeys completed without an issue are rarely captured, even when a driver drives for hours without a miss. This explains why deaths and injuries make headlines while rescued figure rarely does.
Perhaps it is time to dedicate a column to celebrating such deviants, those who resist the temptation to turn public roads into a theatre of chaos. We should give them medals for honouring pedestrian crossings, maintaining a safe following distance, and refraining from turning our highways into audition venues for action movies.
Until we arrive at that decision, this column today offers flowers to drivers who have chosen to be deviants. Flowers for drivers who respect speed limits. Flowers for the commercial driver who refuses to overload. Flowers to the driver who declines distraction through phone use. Flowers to the motorcyclist who wears a helmet. Flowers for the fleet operators who prioritise safety over profit. Flowers for every operator who understands that arriving safely is more important than arriving first. Flowers to every convoy driver who drives by the rules and not the pride or ego of their principal
In our clime, where we celebrate those undeserving while ignoring true heroes, these deviants deviate from recklessness. They deviate from impatience. They deviate from carelessness. They deviate from dangerous driving. And the assumption that road crashes happen only to others.
Today, I doff my hat for you. I salute you for being noble. May your kind increase. May your example spread. And may the rest of us who have a date with death detour and copy your examples of patience, safe driving, courtesy, decency on the wheel, respect for other road users and the sanctity of life. May others choose safety and cut down deaths and injuries on our roads.
